Unnecessary Observations about Netflix’s Bleach

These are all of the observations I made whilst watching Bleach that weren’t really relevant to the written review.

The following dotpoints are the thoughts I had and jotted down at random–they’re not overall useful, but hey, I thought they were note-worthy enough to post. Unless you’ve watched live-action Bleach, you may not totally understand what’s being said.

  • Is that Johnny Yong Bosch as Ichigo in the English dub? I think I may just like this movie.
    • Hell, I think I may like this anime.
  • As a casual viewer, it’s hard to keep a straight face when experiencing some of this dialogue. This is the glory of anime, honestly.
    • Note to self: watch the damn anime.
  • Fuck, this film’s hysterical. They picked a strong English voice cast.
  • This film is . . . very hands-on. Between Ichigo’s father knocking him around, to Rukio’s “training”, I feel kind of bad for Ichigo. Even if his pain is for my mild and concerning enjoyment. It’s satisfying to see him kick some ass by the time the film’s over.
    • And even then, the film ends with his ass handed to him. So I ended the film feeling unsatisfied on his behalf.
  • It’s incredibly convenient that Ichigo chooses not to tell Rukio that Uryū just tried to kill him and may have been the cause of the Hollow in the park. It’s not as if Ichigo would not have made that assumption (Uryū practically snaps his fingers and tells him he’ll make him use his Reaper powers, for fuck sake). Considering he’s only in this mess because Rukio inadvertently got him involved, there is no reason for him not to expect her to get him un-involved.
  • Kids, don’t rub water from random vials in your pocket on deadly open wounds. Even if those wounds aren’t technically on your real body. I don’t care if Bleach says it’ll definitely heal your wounds–it will not.
  • Ichigo’s father: Don’t bring home any girls!
    • Also Ichigo’s father: Okay, you can bring home girls, but only if they drag your possibly-dead-ass home, first!
  • Is the whole “hey guys! Did you hear about Ichigo! He was in an accident!” “OMG what happened!?!” “He died, dead on the spot” thing a running gag? Whatever it is, I love it and the English cast should be commended for its delivery.
  • Wait, how would Ichigo know Uryū would be in a random fast food joint?
  • There’s a point at the tail-end of the monologue scene between Rukia and her brother where you realize that for a small period of time, Ichigo is no longer relevant, and he has to be re-inserted into the film’s plot so to kick-start his training montage and continuation of his hero’s journey. It’s almost as if the writers accidentally wrote themselves into a corner, and had to use what might be an anime plot line to get them out.
  • Did anyone else get a weird Elektra (2005) feel? The mother Hollow being kind of . . . vine? . . . like? . . . didn’t help that nostalgia.
  • It’s surprisingly refreshing to see a family having a bright conversation about memorials. It gives Ichigo’s family a realistic feel–their father is making do with what he has and is keeping things optimistic for his teenage son and young daughters.
  • “Can you go down the hill to the vending machine to get drinks, Ichigo”–are you seriously telling me, kids, that your father packed beer to share with your deceased mother, but you guys conveniently forgot to pack any other kind of drink for your picnic?
  • Ichigo gets caught in an illusion by a Hollow and spends an unreasonable amount of time entertaining it. “It’s an illusion watch out!” Jee, thanks, Rukia. You couldn’t have said that earlier?
  • You would definitely have been crushed under that rubble by now.
  • “Sorry I’m late, just had to go grab my bow from my bedroom.” © Netflix
    I don’t suppose Uryū could whip out his handy-dandy bow and arrow and lend a hand, could he? No? Cool, lets leave it to the maybe-superpowered-human friend Chad, then. Not as if a Hollow is ripping your town to pieces.
    • I stand corrected Uryū actually shows up not too long after the civilians are attacked to help. I guess he had to go and get his bow.
  • I said it about Devil May Cry 4 and I’ll say it about Bleach: Bosch’s screams in the recording booth really make his performance. I don’t think I’ve ever heard more dedicated screams from a voice actor.
  • THEY FUCKING KILLED URYŪ JUST WHEN I STARTED TO LIKE HIM ARE YOU SERIOUS FILM YOU BRING HIM BACK AND YOU BRING HIM BACK NOW
    • . . . they brought him back but . . . who the fuck knows how he’s back? He just randomly shows up totally fine in the last couple minutes of the film. The fuck, movie?
  • There’s a spot during the fight between Ichigo and Renji where there’s a shot that looks like Renji is about to shove the tip of his katana into Ichigo’s head–and as quickly as you saw it, it’s gone in the next shot. To think, had he followed through on that attack, he might not have been defeated.
  • This is the second time I’ve seen Johnny Yong Bosch’s character have his ass handed to him by a guy with a katana, and the second time his I’m not dead yet line is “I will protect her!”. Like Travis Willingham is always the authority figure/military man, Bosch seems to be type-cast as characters who get stabbed by many pointy things, yet just walks it off.
    • Specifically, and preferably, stabbed with a katana.
  • Rukia has had basically twenty minutes to intervene between Renji and Byakuya taking turns at making a suchi dish out of Ichigo–literally just stands there for about that amount of time doing jack squat while all this is happening–and it’s only at the 1:35 hour mark that she decides “you know what, maybe he’s had enough sword for one day”. I get it, it’s for story reasons–he has to build his power in order to transfer it back to Rukia, I guess–but by the time the film transfers her Reaper powers back to her, it doesn’t feel like Ichigo’s earned it. He was defeated by Byakuya. He didn’t win that fight. When she leaves with his sushi masters, he’s even disappointed in himself that he still had to be protected by someone else.
    • If you squint and tilt your head, this character achieved nothing in the long run.
    • It feels like there’s a context that I’m missing here.
  • Fullmetal Alchemist‘s live-action film had the guts to stick a post-credit scene many, many people missed with Envy’s mini form, suggesting they’d possibly get a second film. Bleach is at least respectful and chooses not sink their chips into a potential sequel, though leaves the door open for one.
  • So I wanted to watch Bleach (anime) after enjoying the film, but guess what AU Netflix users: Bleach isn’t on Netflix.
    • A big “fuck you” to whoever decided Bleach and FMA: Brotherhood doesn’t need to be Netflix for the Australian audience.

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